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Items tagged with "School Bus"


Fc27e280943

If I was Dennis Hopper in Speed, I would rig buses so that if they went ABOVE 50 miles per hour they would explode. They'd say, "That seems like an irrational and not terribly dangerous form of terrorism", and I'd say I'm doing it to compel people to be more careful drivers and not abuse the speed limit, especially in school zones. I'd be the deadly 'Mostly Inneffectual But Quite Informative Advocate For Highway And Auto Safety Bomber'.


Fc26e280943Look at Hugh's left arm in panel three. That looks to be an uncomfortable position to be in. Perhaps he's horribly dislocated his shoulders in between panels, a silent yet perceptibly painful protest to being a fictional character in an imaginary world, doomed to live out an immortal existence devoid of free will that compels him to follow his preordained path to a unavoidable destination, conscious the entire time of his wretched illusory reality and the lack of autonomy it represents. Or I was tired and felt like a nap, so I phoned it in on the picture-making. Either way.


Fc25e280943

What happened to the days when city buses had massive snack bars, and water beds, and home entertainment systems with Kindergarten Cop on DVD? I'll tell you: never, because I made all of that up, right now. However, I don't see why our government can't institute that. They should just sell most of the buses and spend all of the money on one enormous, super deluxe bus, with sweet flame decals and Speed Racer-esque car superpowers, like those car stilts or the submarine mode or that weird android homing pigeon one. Or just cut out the middleman entirely and launch people from place to place through Wile E. Coyote catapults. Why hasn't the government done this? I can't tell you; I don't think anyone could. Thanks, OBAMA.


Fc24e280943

It seems inconvenient to build a liquor store right next to a sharp incline like that. If I lived there or near there, I'd go to the store at night and wait for the drunks to stumble out in a stupor, and then wait for them to pass out and then roll them down the hill, for fun. Like cow-tipping, except more sadistic. Now that I think about it, that's going on my life bucket list. That makes more than two things:

—Roll a drunk down a hill
—Invent jetpack hockey
—Golden Girls/Firefly crossover


Fc23e280942

It sure is convenient that hobos take on descriptive monikers like that. You need not wonder what to expect from a fellow named 'Armpit Steve'.*

*Pro Tip: Expect armpits of some kind.


Fc22e280942

I love that moustache so much. if I could grow facial hair, I don't think there would be any doubts that that would be what I would wear. That, or I would die my hair green, grow it until it went entirely over my body, and then pretend to be an overly large chia pet. And I would pose in the corner in a pot in my cover story guy's house, and then the guy would bring his house guests over and say "You like my giant chia pet? I got it off eBay," and then I would jump out at them and they'd scream, and then we'd all have a good laugh.